OH EM GEE
I feel like every woman should have this amazing product in their life. No more fear of stinking up the office when you have to go after that large cup of coffee. If a guy is reading this, please disregard, you all know that women do not poop. It's okay.
"It is now a pleasure to poop" says my boss
When one of your interview questions is "are you offended by a fart?" coming directly from the Dr. himself (true story), you know immediately you've just made a mistake by answering no, without thinking this trough.
I work in a small medical clinic and my boss is the doctor. It is not uncommon for him to walk by and crop dust his staff. These are the kind of farts that once you smell it, your head snaps up, you nostrils burn like the fires of hell and you know you are trapped in your desk area for at least 5 minutes. This is a miniscule offense compared to what he does to that unfortunate bathroom EVERY MORNING, he is perhaps the most rank man alive when it comes to using the "office," as we call it. He is not shy about his masterpieces and will even enlighten you as to how once could produce such a pungent scent...usually this issues stems from the dinner his wife made the night before. Now when I hear the words "dehydrated onions, venison or beans" I inadvertently have an eye twitch; nothing can compare to a mocha, seemingly harmless...that coffee combo makes me pray to God my nose will live through the day.
The vomit inducing odors that vent from the office at approximately 8:15 every morning...odors that are so putrid it could gag a maggot, the kind that could make even the manliest of men weep like a teenage girl, are most definitely the reason I searched the Google for products to stop the abomination seeping from his anal cavity. He frequently has tears in his eyes after his morning run-in with the loo.
When I found PooPourri, it promised to banish all odors, including the severest of offenders, such as my boss. Reliving the nostril violation, still fresh from that morning, I quickly purchased this item. We waited and when the UPS man came in the front door we were all over that package, we then told the Dr. to go test this product. A few minutes later he emerged stating "it smells like I crapped a lemon drop." He now finds that is it "a pleasure to poop," although I can't be fooled, I know he enjoyed his own musk. Too bad for him. Success, THANK YOU JESUS!
I thought this was a gimmick until I saw it on MmandL- YouTube channel. Figured if it works for them, I'll try it. It totally works and I'm the type of person that, if I pooped, which I don't because I'm a girl, I would hold it for days if company was over. No way would I ever go if anyone was near. I mean, if I pooped, that is. But since I don't because I'm a girl, I imagine that this would be 9-1-1 for anyone who had to go. I also hate it when guests poop in my house. I hate knowing that their poop molecules are floating around my living space so I keep a bottle of this in each bathroom. I'm considering putting one in every bathroom at work, too, for those who insist on going in a public place. I feel it's the responsible thing to do and eventually I'll get promoted because I took action.
You can't take down the mighty poo pourri
I used 4 sprays and launched my worst in and it couldn't take down the poo pourri. Poo Pourri has me beat 2-0 but I will not give up.
Saved My Marriage
This product not only made pooping more exciting, it also rescued my marriage from the blaming and the name calling.
It works great!
I'm 262 pounds and eat everything not nailed down. Tried it and it works. Ordering a few more bottles for the RV.
Fear Work Poos No more!
My dearest Poo-pouri manufacturers,
Oh happy day! Oh glorious, beautiful, joyous day. Shame has vanished and pride has replaced it! But perhaps I must start from the very beginning? When my turmoil each day was of such magnitude each time I was forced to face the infamous beast known as my bowel movement? Now, my bowel movements religiously follow a distinct cycle -- thirty minutes upon devouring a meal, I shall have to -- how do I write this -- relieve myself. Alas, I, like the many others inflicted, do not have the ability nor the strength to tame my bowl movement to my will -- nor did I have control over its odor. Oh the odor! It was to me as the Lernaean Hydra was to Hercules -- each time I tried to conceal it or cut it off by attempting to conceal the mouth of the porcelain throne with my buttocks, it would grow greater still until it was a terrible beast, filling the air with fumes until those who came in would pass to floor, dead (or at least unconscious).
But how to face this tortuous quandary? After much prayer, the solution came to me upon watching a video on a delightful internet channel called youtube. There was an advertisement involving a young woman sharing the horrors of facing her own foul Hydra but being able to defeat it! At first I thought it was a farce. This could not be. No! Such a miracle would be impossible! Such a thing only existed in fairy tales with happy endings!.... It just couldn't exist But out of curiosity (and a bit of desperation) I ventured to the OnlineShopDealer world and to my amazement, there it was -- S***tin Pretty in all of its glory.
At once I ordered it for my office and waited everyday peering over my desk for the mail carrier to arrive...until finally, a package was there in his arms! For me. From The OnlineShopDealer!-- And just in time too. I rushed to the bathroom, sprayed no more than four times and went about my business. I took a deep breath. And then another. And another. Shame vanished from my chest, a burden was lifted from my mind and I... I was free at last, the beast was conquered, defeated-- never to rise again.
Nowadays others who wander into the restroom while I relieve myself do not run in fear or faint from overexposure. Not at all! On the contrary, they swing the door wide open and comment to themselves: "Why! Someone here is doing her business! How lucky am I to stumble upon her at this opportune moment and breathe in the delicious scent of PooPouri! How marvelous!"
I am pleased to say that I have vanquished my beast, but have you done so to yours? Let PooPouri be your weapon of choice as you face your many headed (and mephitic) foe.
Cloaking Device Detected
Atlantic Dateline: 29/10/2013 0807.32 hrs.
Subject: Cloaking Device
At 0807 hrs, it was observed that the sewer sub "Brown Oktober" was launched from dry dock for her maiden voyage. Upon hitting the placid water, she disappeared below the surface and "odorbouys" were unable to detect her passing as the surface of the water appeared to be treated with a heretofore unknown substance that masked any trace of the vessel's passing.
Investigation to follow.
Atlantic Dateline: 25/06/2014 0822.11 hrs.
Subject: Cloaking Device Follow Up Investigation
Follow up investigations have revealed that the surface of the water had been treated with a super secret substance known as Poo~Pourri (in original scent). Central Command authorized commando raids behind enemy lines to capture samples, and commence extensive field trials. After samples were obtained extensive testing began. Results to follow.
Samples indicated that four to six sprays were to be applied to the surface of water. Compliance to indications was carried out with initial applications of six pumps of the product. Immediately, the room was filled with an aroma that was bright and citrusy. Sensors indicated the presence of Lemongrass, Grapefruit, and Bergamot. Testers notes report that the aroma was extremely pleasant. Initial tests were performed by the research team then a broader test group, and the first subject had reported consuming the previous night and morning, the following items: cheap beer, underdone chicken wings, (with bleu cheese that had sat out too long), pickled jalapeños, two cups of coffee and a breakfast burrito. Subject was reporting extreme cramps, and had a strong urge to use the toilet. Surface was treated with six pumps. Researches stationed outside the bathroom indicated lots of strange noises and grunts emanating from within'. Upon completion of the trial. Subject was heard to exclaim, "I don't smell nuthin'!". This was verified by the research team after the subject vacated the testing area.
Excerpt from one testers personal notes: "Subject "x" was really putting a hurting on the poor toilet. From outside the door, it sounded as if a cow was urinating on a flat rock. All of us on the team agreed, drawing on past experiences, a poo'ing such as this, could result in a smell that could burn the eyes of Satan sitting in his burning sulfur throne room. Something so bad, the building would have to be aired out for days afterward. Lighting a match wouldn't be advisable, as the air may combust from the concentration of methane and god knows what else. We all heard Subject "x" exclaim that he didn't smell anything, and we all rolled our eyes at each other, as the unspoken word is your own sh*t always smells like roses, so we took the words with a grain of salt. When Subject "x" left the bathroom, we braced ourselves for the foulness that was sure to assail our noses. What we were greeted with was a pleasant, bright, citrus aroma with zero fecal undertones. At the worst, the expectations were that of "S***rus" (S***rus = the scent of cheap commercial air fresheners combined with fecal odors, to create citrus scented s***......s***rus), no fecal undertones were detected, and we decreed the first test a success."
Subsequent secret trials were carried out, all tests were a resounding success. Experimentation was performed in regards to variances in the proper application (4 pumps or 6) to the surface. It has been determined by the data collected that four pumps is sufficient to tame some of the foulest of turds to ever be unleashed.
More personal testing notes:
"After closed testing trials were complete, our orders were to test on an unsuspecting general population. All standard air freshening substances were removed from public restrooms within' the facility, and replaced with Poo~Pourri. Speculation is, that like apes left a stick in front of a termite mound, the unsuspecting users figured out what it was for. As to strangers unfamiliar with the product, and apparently, a non-comprehension of clear directions for application on the vessel itself, we've noted that an overuse of the product can occur. And, just as anything else, too much of a good thing can be too much. Cloying odors of citrus hung in a cloud like a barrier, in the hallway leading to the lavatories. Posting clear directions seemed to have an effect on this problem. Also noted, the well being of the users seemed to improve as they were "emboldened" if you will, to do as they pleased knowing their tracks would be covered by the Poo~Pourri. Moreover, part of our research was to listen to the groundswell chatter in the common areas and report the positives and negatives overheard. Water cooler chatter about the product was overwhelmingly positive. I recommend to move forward into the next stage."
Upon reviewing of the data and recommendations by the testing panel, we've decided to go ahead and enter into a contract with the provider. Based on the volume of usage in the facility, we've contacted the producer to see if they can provide us with 55 gallon drums of the product to install next to the toilets. Ideally, we'd like to have a tanker deliver in bulk and fill tanks that could pipe directly to the toilets. A panel will be commissioned to determine the feasibility of such a system. Also, to be noted. Upon first shipment after field trials, different scents were implemented. Trap-A-Crap, and Heavy Doody (in camouflage). Both were excellent and not as heavy on the citrus scent with Heavy Doody becoming the clear favorite as indicated by usage.
Good value even with the S/h - A product my home cannot live without!
We used to buy 3 of the 4 ounce size at a local gift shop for $19.95 each which comes to $59.85. I ordered this large bottle plus a 4 ounce bottle of the No. 2 scent (which I prefer) and it came to 40.42 - a savings of 19.43 which is almost like getting the 4 ounce bottle for free! That's a good value when you consider how important this stuff can become to the peaceful coexistence of man and woman!
This product does what it says it does and it will prevent bathroom odor rather than covering it up. The formula is some kind of combination of starches and oils that when sprayed on the surface of your toilet water, forms a protective film that traps odor and gases. There are other products out there claiming to the same with a squeeze bottle but they come in mint or menthol scents and the squeeze bottles aren't as easy to use as this product which has a measured spray. I've tried a few and I much prefer the Poo Pourri because it doesn't have a perfume scent. instead, the original is a citrus scent leaning towards the mandarin orange side of things. I like the No.2 scent better because it has more of a Bergamot scent. Bergamot is that citrus fruit whose peel is used to scent Earl Grey tea.
The product suggest 4 to 6 sprays but we use between 6 and 7 sprays for best results if youy are a heavy, ahem, user of the bathroom. Anything more than that would be SO overpowering. Remember, you only want to eliminate odor, you don't want to use the stuff as a room spray! So, 3 to 7 spray onto the water and you're good to go, literally. Anything UNDER the water will have it's odor locked. That's an important little fact. Remember it when using the product. Also, if you have a bathroom "reader", ask them to flush ASAP and then continue with their "reading" for best results. The spray won't trap odor as effectively if your "reader" waits until he's finished his book, magazine or newspaper to flush. UPDATE: now that I've gotten better at spraying the stuff, I can adequately cover the bowl with a good "seal" in just 3 good sprays." That helps with the frequency of purchase.
This product might seem like a funny joke but I can tell you from experience that it makes sharing a bathroom a lot easier. Once you've had it on hand for a while, you won't want to be without it. It is NOT A ROOM FRESHENER - it is an ODOR PREVENTER!
WORKED GREAT WHEN YOU HAD ONE BATHROOM AND TEN PEOPLE USING IT. FAN WAS BROKEN IN THE BATHROOM. WITH OUT THIS IT WOULD HAVE BEEN ROUGH